August 2008
76 posts
Dear Valued Consumer
I hate you and your obnoxious, ill-behaved fuck trophies.
P.S. - It’s not a to-MAH-to. Go back to New England you cunt.
postscript
Taking photos of a leaning tower of anything just suggests you don’t know how to hold your fucking camera correctly.
stats
number of individuals trained: 8
percent over 50 years old: 100%
percent female: 75%
percent Jewish: 120%
number trying to set me up with their single daughter/granddaughter/niece: 4
bad news
There is a Dunkin Donuts at my bus terminal. As Kevin would say, fat kid paradise commences.
In parts of Belgium you have to pay a fee to use a car radio!
And in Denmark you have to pay a television license if your mobile phone has TV capabilities!
Am I the only one...
…that didn’t know in the UK you have to pay an annual fee called a ‘television license’ of £139.50 to legally operate a television set in your home?
“It is the business of educated people to speak so that no one may be able to tell in what county their childhood was passed.”
—A. Burrell
12 years ago...
If you had told me that I would be driving in Bullitt County, KY listening to music through the speakers in my car that is actually on a friend’s computer in Virginia but I am receiving it from a phone that is pulling the music through the air from a series of towers provided by AT&T I would have not believed you for a second.
So next time your phone drops a call or you don’t have 3G for 10 miles or any one of the million issues we have with today’s technology occurs, consider ourselves extremely spoiled.
Because 12 years ago I would have called you a fucking liar.
So cool it!
Play
Play
Play
fridayisdonutday was pleased on Sunday to meet the father of Miss Marples, Mr. Tom Marples.
Why Kevin and I are friends
- Kevin: Did you get a funnel cake sundae?
- Jason: Hell yes I did with strawberry chip ice cream
- Kevin: That sounds awful
- Jason: It was pretty fantastic
- Kevin: Fruit does not belong in ice cream.
- Jason: LOL. Strawberry flavored ice cream?
- Kevin: FRUIT DOES NOT BELONG WITH ICE CREAM
- Jason: Ok ok
- Jason: Mmm this strawberry ice cream is tasty
- Kevin: Fucking vomit in my vagina
New theme courtesy thingschange.
“Things happen on this earth of which we have no control and no knowledge, but they make us who we are and influence our lives tremendously. Embrace these unknowns and you find that the control you have over you life will improve and become effortless to maintain.”
—
Play
“Jason, you just need to quit life.”
—Baby Blevins
“Will is the best thing that has ever happened to your existence.”
—Richard Sams
-tucky:
the suffix used by Ohioans to describe a part of town that is more rural than the one they live in.
ex. “Did you hear about the guy in Grovetucky* who was running a prostitution ring from his junkyard?”
*Grove City, OH
Courtesy “drew” via toothpastefordinner.com (Thanks!)
Happiness.
Hearing a new recording of one of your newest compositions.
No-so-happiness.
Playing an excerpt for a friend and having him tells you he likes it but it’s like Danny Elfman met a Mexican mamacita and had a bastard composer baby.
FAIL
